ARTICLE: Role Reversal

By: Fatoumata Nabie Fofana

Today's edition is focused on wives taking on roles as primary breadwinners in their families while their husbands assuming the stay-at-home role with the responsibilities of raising the children. Nowadays, more women in Liberian are becoming primary breadwinners for their families; stepping away from their 'home-keeper' roles.

The argument is that role reversal is inapplicable to our African context and several reasons have been outlined by many Liberians interviewed by Women & Family.

They said: “Having a woman performs the role of a provider or a breadwinner in the family has its attached potential stigmas for the man.”

As observed during separate interviews, the fear is that when a woman begins to play the sole provider role in the home, the man gets to feel extremely insecure. In some instances, he gets exposed to a lot of frustrations as some actions of the wife might suggest that he is insignificant as it relates to the upkeep of the home. He might feel as though he has no say in decision-making in the home. It is believed that men who find themselves in such situation are often ridiculed in our traditional setting, for “having no substance.”

Our interviewees quickly nodded in the affirmative when asked whether they felt the role reversal concept was best fit for the developed world. “This concept just cannot work in our African traditional context. Apart from the man feeling insecure in the home, let's look at the other side of the coin. African women in general always love to be at the receiving end. Liberian women may not be an exception to this. Even if she is out-earning him financially, a typical Liberian wife will still want her husband to play his role as the designated income provider or executive officer in the home,” an interviewee said.

Did What They Had To

Let us first take a reflective look at the role of women as sole providers for their families during the Liberian civil crisis. It may be recalled that at a certain point during the heat of the Liberian war, when it was extremely unsafe or dangerous for ordinary men or civilians to be seen in public, they were constrained to allow a shift in the breadwinner role by having their wives make life-threatening sacrifices for the survival of their families in such hostile circumstances. Role reversal in this context was about having remarkable strength and fortitude as women who tirelessly strove to protect and ensure the survival of their families while finding candid ways of coping with their nightmare.

Tradition Says 'No'

“On the cultural or traditional side of the coin, the responsibilities of staying at home and raising the children are perceived as a natural gender role of a woman. Frankly, men do not generally believe in becoming stay-at-home dads to allow their wives step outside the home into the public sphere as breadwinners. In our recent past, men were constrained to allow this shift in gender roles, especially during the heat of the war when it became extremely unsafe for them to be seen in public.

“Women were then forced to play this role. And you know… that is understandable. But now, it is impossible. It could be a common practice in the developed world. Nevertheless, the deep rooted notion is that women are mothers who need to oversee the upbringing of the children,” says a professional educator.

Another interviewee said: “Our context, as Africans, is different from that of the developed world. However, it is, to some extent, practiced by some ethnic groups in Liberia as a tradition. But looking at the way it manifests itself in this context, one may feel one gender is being marginalized by the other in the process. To put it bluntly, the women of Southeastern Liberia are the ones who assume the masculine role in the home. What do I mean by masculine role? The women are the ones who basically endure hard labor to ensure the sustenance of their families.”

Southeastern Role-play

Some southeastern Liberians agree that “when it comes to rice cultivation, for instance, it is the women. They even climb palm trees to cut palm nuts; a job that was solely reserved for the men.”

The reverse is what happens in Lofa and other regions of the country. The men there effectively play their masculine roles --- in terms of hard labor --- in the home.

There were others who were of the view that the fundamental rights of the women of Southeastern Liberia were being trampled upon in such process. They contended that these women are being 'enslaved' by their husbands in the process of role reversal.
“They do all the hard labor work, especially during crops cultivation. All the men do is brush the farm, burn and clear it. The rest of the hard work is left with the women to implement. He might occasionally go hunting or fishing at his pleasure.

“For instance, women are required to heat water for their husbands, take it to the bathhouse and after they get through having their baths, they leave the bucket right there for their wives to go and get it from the bath room. These men are then served the best portion of the food their women had spent an entire day struggling to find. After eating, they leave the emptied dishes right there, for the women to remove them for washing.”

Here's the punch, though. In some parts of the Southeast, it has been confirmed; women prefer this reversal of roles, i.e. more hard labor for themselves and less for their men, because they complain that if their men do so much work, they (men) wouldn't be able to “perform” on the intimate agenda. Too easy a bargain for a man, most other women might think. But these are some of the realities.